it's 4 in the morning and I'm still awake. So what else is new?

I don't know how I feel. At first I thought it was just fatigue associated with (ladies, you know what). But deeper into the night, a deeper feeling of senselessness I feel. Like I'm being pulled into several different directions. What for? I do not know. I have no fuckin' idea.

I felt like crying but it never came. I wish I can just cry and get this over with. But how do you do that when you don't even know what's going on?

Am I tired? I think not.

Am I lonely? Probably

Am I sick? Sick of things maybe.

Am I bored? Not sure if boredom can generate this kind of feeling.

Do I want something? If I did I'm not sure what.

Dare I write the more personal question? Am I daring enough?

Maybe it's the personal question I need to focus on. The answer's bound to be there.

Do I have the guts to hurt someone? I'm not sure.

Is this my answer? I don't know.

Do I want an answer?